The Background of Beliefs About Ourselves
Some challenging experiences we encounter in daily life can, often without our awareness, lead us to develop strong and enduring beliefs about ourselves. Especially during periods when our psychosocial functioning is negatively affected and we feel psychologically vulnerable, we may tend to explain what is happening not in terms of environmental conditions, context, or momentary reactions, but directly through our sense of self. This tendency can open the door to generalized and harsh internal conclusions such as “There is something wrong with me,” “I am inadequate,” or “I am a failure.”
For example, consider a student who experiences intense anxiety in social settings. When the instructor unexpectedly asks a question during class, the student becomes highly anxious; their heart rate increases, bodily tension rises, and their mind may feel as if it has gone blank. In such a situation, being unable to answer the question is actually quite understandable. However, rather than interpreting the experience as “I got anxious and struggled in that moment,” the person often makes self-evaluative conclusions such as “I must be a failure,” “I’m not intelligent,” or “I embarrassed myself in front of everyone.”
Yet, when we look at the situation from a physiological perspective, we see that a very different mechanism is at work. When the brain is under intense stress and perceives threat, the limbic system—particularly the amygdala, which is more oriented toward survival and rapid response—becomes activated. During this process, the activity of the prefrontal regions of the brain, which play a crucial role in planning, attention, reasoning, and verbal expression, may temporarily decrease. In other words, the person is genuinely in a biological state in which they are “less able to think” at that moment. This is not a stable indicator of intelligence or ability, but rather a natural effect of stress on the brain.
However, when these physiological processes are not recognized, the experienced difficulty can easily turn into negative and inaccurate beliefs about the self. Over time, these beliefs become reinforced, further increase anxiety in similar situations, and create a vicious cycle. The person not only struggles in the moment but also begins to limit themselves with thoughts like “This is just how I am.” While this is an example rooted in physiological processes, similar patterns can also emerge from environmental and contextual factors.
In psychotherapy, the background of such experiences is explored collaboratively. The context of events, bodily reactions, automatic thoughts, and how these evolve into beliefs over time are examined. The aim is to help the individual recognize the narrative they have developed about themselves—one that often does not fully align with reality—and to cultivate a more realistic, compassionate, and flexible perspective. In doing so, the person can begin to understand their struggles not as personal defects, but as a natural part of being human and of biological and psychological processes.
Written By:Clinical Psychologist Ali ŞAHİN