Distress Intolerance:
What Is It; What Can Be Done?
Feeling anxious before an exam, experiencing anger during an argument, or feeling deep sadness when you lose someone you love... All of these are a natural part of life, and we all experience these emotions in various situations. Of course, experiencing negative emotions is unpleasant for everyone, but some people struggle more than others to tolerate these emotions; they may even dedicate their lives to avoiding them. In psychology, this is called "distress intolerance."

What Is Distress Intolerance?

Distress intolerance is the perceived capacity to tolerate negative emotional states and to respond in situationally inappropriate ways in order to escape them immediately. This does not mean being "weak"; rather, it is the belief that one cannot withstand negative emotions and cannot cope with them. For example:

• • Constantly postponing a difficult but necessary conversation
• • Leaving tasks until the last minute to avoid stressful situations
• • Overeating, shopping excessively, or spending too much time on social media to suppress negative emotions

Resorting to these avoidance behaviors brings relief in the short term but causes problems to persist and grow in the long term.

Why Is It Important?

Distress intolerance is a common factor underlying many psychological problems. It is closely associated with anxiety disorders, depression, substance use, and eating disorders, among others. It contributes to the emergence and maintenance of psychological problems. At the same time, because avoidance of negative emotions is central to the lives of individuals with low distress tolerance, their quality of life is also seriously diminished.

What Can Be Done?

The capacity to tolerate distress is not a fixed or unchangeable trait. On the contrary, it can be developed by working on specific thoughts and behaviors. Below are some helpful suggestions:

1. Recognize and name your emotions: Give your emotion a name by saying "This is anxiety" or "This is sadness." This helps you recognize your emotions and create distance from them.

2. Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable for a while: You do not need to escape immediately from uncomfortable emotions. Sometimes simply staying with the feeling and allowing it to pass is enough.

3. Do not try to get rid of it: Instead of trying to eliminate the negative emotion, when you return to whatever task you were doing, you will see that the emotion will diminish on its own without needing to push it away.

4. Gather evidence that "I can tolerate it": Remember times when you have coped with difficult emotions before. Noticing moments when you have coped in the past will help you see that you can cope in the future and recognize that your thoughts of "I cannot tolerate this" are not facts, but merely thoughts.

5. Seek professional support: If you find that you are struggling to cope with negative emotions and that this is significantly affecting your life in areas such as school, work, family, or relationships, you can seek help from a professional. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is an effective psychotherapy method that addresses distress intolerance.

In Sum:
Distressing emotions are an inevitable part of life. Rather than avoiding distressing emotions, enhancing the capacity to tolerate them strengthens individuals across a range of problems and increases their coping capacity.

Written By: İclal Eskioğlu Aydın